The PAUSE in Menopause

Posted on Jul 01 2009

Menopause should more accurately be called menohalt, as reader Jackie M points out. I wonder sometimes about the scientists or health professionals that named it - were they overly optimistic? Confused? Clueless? Where actually is the PAUSE in menopause?

I think I may have figured it out. The Pause might be a pause for reflection. We can’t remember anything, can’t function as we used to, are clueless and confused ourselves. We reevaluate everything. We pause to ask ourselves who we are. We look back to who we’ve been up until the Big M. We look ahead to the woman we might become.

We pause to ask what WE want, rather than what does our family, our work, our world want from us. We cease going on automatic and examine our life from the sides, the bottom, the soft juicy core.

The Big M ushers in a host of other m’s, not the least of which is mortality. A pretty big M in its own right, mortality reminds us that this ride is not forever, so we had better choose our manner of conveyance and pay attention to the journey.

We pause to ponder what we might be when we grow up. We pause to consider what we might wish to leave behind when we shuffle off this mortal slinky. Mostly, we pause to appreciate, to savor flowers and love and blue sky and books and girlfriends.

I recently discovered Vibrant Nation, a website for women over fifty, when they posted an article about my book “The Big M”. I liked the site and its conversations. so I joined. When I filled out the personal info page with bio and the usual stats, I came to a box that asked me to send a postcard to my younger self.

I was delighted and intrigued. What would I say to her/me if I could? Besides love your body because it changes, don’t sweat the small stuff, clean less and play more, work and success are okay, but love and gratitude make for a meaningful life. Stuff like that.

In the end, I simply wrote this:

Dear Me,

It's all worth it - it only gets better. I'll be (am) glad when you are here.

All my best,

Me

What would YOU write to your younger self? Let me know and maybe we’ll be able to pass on our notes to our daughters and the young goddesses in training. Pause, reflect, and send that virtual postcard to the sweet, young you from the wiser, vibrant woman you’ve become. Let’s really put the PAUSE in menopause.

(photo for this posting by my handsome hubby, Dewitt Jones)

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Learn About Your Choices at Hormone Balance Conference

Posted on Jun 24 2009

Learn About Your Choices at Hormone Balance Conference

Women In Balance, a non-profit organization, and leader in hormone balance education for women, announces one day health conferences at the Waterfront Marriott Hotel in Portland OR on Saturday August 1st, 2009 and in Orlando, FL on October 24, 2009.

The need for unbiased information on hormone balance and natural options has received great attention since Oprah Winfrey had a series of episodes discussing bio-identical hormone therapy. Women In Balance created a national series of all day conferences because of the groundswell of interest in hormone balancing and it's impact on overall health.

“Our mission at Women in Balance is to empower women to take charge of their hormone health. Our informative conference is a wonderful way to begin the journey to optimal health”, says Dr. Jane Murray MD, chair and founding member of Women in Balance, and Medical Director of Sastun Center of Integrative Health, in Overland Park, Kansas. The Conference package includes exciting national speakers, a workbook, goodie bag of product samples and a health conscious luncheon, for $50.

The event has limited seating to create an intimate space for participants to allow questions of the speakers, and networking opportunity with other women with similar issues. Topics include: Understanding Hormone Balance - How your body really works, Lifestyle approaches for Hormone Balance - Dealing with your new normal, and Options for Midlife Health - Empowering yourself to hormone balance.

To register for the conference please go online to: WomeninBalance

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Taking A Break From Menopause

Posted on Jun 20 2009

There are definitely days that I’d like to take a break from The Big M. Even when I’m not particularly hot, sweaty, cranky, or weepy, most of the time it feels like Menopause has taken over my life.

Okay, okay, I know that the goddesses and I chose this path - we wanted to make sure that no other women had to suffer the uncertainty and panic we went through. If nothing else, we wanted our sister goddesses to travel the journeys through menopause, and more important, the second half of life with one another. And we love this job. But there comes a time when a goddess has just got to take a break.

In that spirit, I am declaring a menopause break for the solstice. On June 21, I’m going to forget about hormones, creams, night sweats, mood swings, and brain fog. I’m going to spend the day being young!

Of course, my laugh lines won’t disappear. My age spots and wattle will still be there. My low-flying tatas will still struggle mightily with gravity (and lose) But just for the day, I’m not going to notice them. (Or care if anyone else does.)

I’m a big fan of the best of second childhood; things like openness and wonder, celebration and play, romps and naps. I’m going to start my second childhood on my Menopause Break Day in earnest by doing whatever frivolous things catch my fancy.

I might plunge into Photoshop and play with my photos. I might sit on the porch and read a novel. I might just zone out and watch the points of light on the water. I will most certainly eat chocolate!

Join me! Let’s play hooky from the Big M and celebrate thinking, feeling, and believing young. Pick a day, doesn’t have to be the solstice (because Father’s Day may not be the easiest day to take off). Who knows, our Menopause Break might become a habit. Second childhood is just around the corner, let’s start practicing now!

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Affirmations for Menopause Goddesses

Posted on Jun 13 2009

My feelings about long plane rides have transformed since the Big M. I now LOVE to climb inside that metal tube and hunker down in my seat blissfully unavailable by phone, tweets, facebookings, email, or solicitors. I’ve even compared these rides to taking bubble baths - Calgon, take me away. (See blog entry of 6/21/08 “A Bubble Bath at 30,000 Feet).

What’s even better than a bubble bath, however, is a bubble bath and a good book. And Goddess-in Training (meaning perimenopausal) Diane Mierzwik’s new book, Weekly Affirmations for Pre-Menopausal Women was the best part of my latest stratospheric bubble bath.

She writes with humor and grace about the changes that afflict us all as we age and travel down the pathway toward menopause and midlife. She chronicles 52 weeks, from New Year to New Year, where her wry and funny observations culminate in an affirmation for each week. Her quirky illustrations complement each entry.

These are not affirmations that place unreal expectations for sainthood upon us or make us feel guilty for being, well, us. Instead, she gives us focus points toward acceptance of where we are and small nudges to who we might wish to become.

Here’s an excerpt to tempt you:
“Week 13
They say the best, given enough time, will rise to the top. So, I’m not sure why cellulite has such a bad rap.

Twenty years ago, I had smooth supple skin. I had “fat in all the right places.” But, did I enjoy it? No, I obsessed with the extra two inches around my waist, the dimples in my bicep areas, the baby roll on my tummy. What I wouldn’t give for that body today, except diet and exercise, you know, sacrifice. The memory of that body is like an egg ready to hatch or explode into an extra 30 pounds around my midriff.

I imagine twenty years from now I will look back on my middle aged body and wish my days away for it like I wish I hadn’t eaten that cookie, but it smelt and tasted so good at the time.

This week, as the weather warms and the malls hang swim suits in the windows, I will love and appreciate the body I have today, cellulite and all, so twenty years from now I will not kick myself for not appreciating the beauty I had when I had it.”

This is a must read for any woman confronting the Changes. My only complaint? The other passengers turning to stare at me when I erupted into laughter as I read all 52 weeks in a single sitting. But hey, they didn’t know that they were joining me in m bubble bath, so they’re forgiven.

Buy the book at Amazon (link below). For more humor and heart, visit Diane's blog at weeklyaffirmations.com.

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